Monday, December 14, 2009

Dating Houses

When you hang out with divorced and separated people, as I do, a regular topic of conversation is that of dating. We discuss the best sites and places for meeting people, the process of getting to know them, deciding what turns you on and off, clarifying what you will and will not accept, and finally making a commitment.

As I start to look at houses, in the hope of buying in the new year, I realize that I'm dating those houses. I'm going through the exact same process as finding a partner, with some of the same rollercoaster of emotions.

First, you scan a whole load of profiles online. At that stage you reject a lot of them straight away, either because of the photos or the descriptions or factual characteristics like the number of bedrooms, which is a bit like looking for someone close to your own height.

Then you go to see some - this is a quick date, meeting for coffee. Again, some you can reject straight away. The look of the place, the feeling you get as you get introduced, warns you that this is not the right one for you.

Some are more interesting. You go back for a second look. You think "Can I live with these characteristics, would I be happy here?"

If the answer is Yes, then you begin to fall in love. You start to plan your life together, the arrangement of furniture, where you'll eat dinner and breakfast, where you'll watch TV or read a book. The more flights of fancy you allow yourself at this stage, creating the perfect romance in your mind, the harder the fall if your bid isn't accepted or you find a fatal flaw in the constuction.

All going well, you make an offer. You wait for it to be accepted - Yes, you're engaged. Friends and families congratulate you, advise you, start thinking about gifts.

Some nervous months later, you tie the knot and with luck, look forward to years of contented living.

So I'm looking for 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, rec room and a yard - do you know Mr. Right?

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